Dangennari.com – Writings on Cancer, Travel and Life

About three or four weeks after I had been diagnosed, Angela and I were out to dinner on a date night courtesy of my mom who graciously watched Dominic.  We went to the Old Vinings Inn, one of our favorite places in Atlanta.  We were having a great conversation and talking a lot about everything we had learned about cancer in the past few weeks.  We were talking about our fears and our hopes.  And she asked me if, during the first few days of my diagnosis, when I was really scared, if I thought of anything I wished I had done, or done differently.  There were certainly a few things I thought of right at that time that I wished I had accomplished already.

But that question stuck with me and I kept thinking that a list of life goals would be a healthy exercise.  I started writing down my goals during chemotherapy treatments and it was a great way to keep my mind focused on the end goal.  I decided to publish my list here on the blog.  I realize that the list is very heavy on travel related goals.  I guess that is who I am though.

At the time I wrote it, I was focusing just on the things I want to accomplish, but as I was typing the list for the blog, I realized, I have also already accomplished a number of significant things I am very proud of and should recognize and celebrate as my favorite moments from the past.  As I complete items on the list, I plan on drawing a line through them and offering the date that I achieved the goal.

I encourage anyone reading this to leave a comment with your own list of goals.  That would be fun to read.  So, without further ado…the list:

1. Pay for my son’s college experience and send him into the world debt free
2. Visit the Taj Mahal and tour India with my friend Karan
3. Drop everything to go and volunteer with rescue and aid efforts at a natural disaster site
4. Graduate from college
5. See BB King in a live performance September 2009
6. Learn to fly a plane…and land
7. Provide breakfast to 100 or more homeless people on New Years Day – would prefer to have no homeless people to feed but that probably is not possible.  As of 2009, Angela and I are up to feeding about 30 on New Years Day on our own and our network of friends is providing meals to a total of about 75 homeless in three different metro areas.
8. Fly somewhere in a private jet
9. Learn to speak Spanish fluently
10. Fill a passport with stamps and start on another before the first one expires
11. Own a vacation home
12. Get a clean 5 year cancer scan
13. Fly first class on a long international flight
14. Start a business and be my own boss
15. Sell a business
16. Be able to honestly say, “Yes, I play golf.”
17. Drive the autobahn
18. Drive cross country – or at least several hundred miles – on a local highway, not an interstate to explore a new part of America
19. Make a complete meal from food and vegetables grown in my own garden
20. Go to Jazz Fest in New Orleans
21. Log at least one skiing day in every month.  I’ve got the easy ones, November through April finished.  Now I need to find places to ski between May and October.
22. Ride my bike on a 100+ mile journey
23. Fish the flats and waters of the Florida Keys
24. Become a husband May 2003
25. Become a dad - October 2006
26. Own a boat
27. Send Angela on a solo trip to Miraval Aug 2009
28. Take a family trip through Africa and deliver boxes full of useful goodies
29. Go to Oktoberfest in Munich
30. Buy my Dad a 1957 Chevy with the torpedo’s on the hood
31. Take Angela back to Venice for a real visit, sans rain, flooding, fatigue and a 4AM wake up call
32. Take a vacation all by myself
33. Buy a house
34. Go to the Macy’s Parade on Thanksgiving with Angela and Dominic and watch it from our own hotel balcony
35. Do the Bay to Breakers with Joe and Gemma
36. Take a trip to the Caribbean seas with the whole family to celebrate the end of cancer
37. Stay at the Victoria Jungfrau
38. Eat feta cheese and olives in Greece
39. Eat sushi in Japan
40. Have tortillas, salsa and margaritas in Mexico - Various dates
41. Eat pasta in Italy – September 2005
42. Drink champagne in France
43. Go to a Luau in Hawaii
44. Eat couscous in the Middle East
45. Visit my cousin George in France and dine at his restaurant
46. Ride in a hot air balloon…and this time have a good experience
47. Sit front right seat on the flight into St. Barths
48. Adopt a needy family every Christmas and provide them with a Christmas tree, presents, dinner and a family photo
49. Live for 6 months – 1 year in another country
50. Build a piece of furniture I can be proud of
51. Teach Dominic to ski
52. Write a poem or song for Angela
53. Learn to make a perfect mojito – I think the secret is in the type of mint used…are there different types of mint? June 2009, I learned that it really helps to make up a syrup instead of using straight sugar, and the ratio of ingredients is super important.
54. Complete my quest for the perfect olive oil bottle and pour spout
55. Spend at least 4 nights at Tabacon Lodge in Costa Rica and actually get to see the volcano this time – not just hear it and feel it
56. Hire a service to clean my house
57. Have a second child

November 12, 2009 – I just recently received the good news that no active cancer cells could be found in the tissue sampled from my tumor.  I am floating on air this week due to that news and anxious to resume a normal life for now, hopefully permanently.  Back in the summer when I was working through all the chemotherapy, Angela asked many of our friends to write encouraging notes to me and she also compiled a list of 50 reasons why I need to beat cancer that were submitted by all of you.  I keep that list on my desk all the time, but I also want to post a few of the reasons here so that I can add them to my official list of things to do in my life.

1. Blow shit up with Chris Raia on 4th of July
2. Go on another Gennari and Paybarah family trip
3. Go to Northville Downs on Kids Day with Aunt Terese and Dominic
4. Go back to Aruba with Angela, Chris and Michelle and take the kids to the lighthouse and show them where it all began
5. Teach Dominic to ski, play hockey and ice skate
6. Take Dominic horseback riding on Mackinac Island with Aunt Karen at 6:00 in the morning to see the sunrise
7. See my own child(ren) get married someday